Dear Mr. Herbert,

I'll try to tell you what my attitude is to the stage and screen rights of The Catcher in the Rye. I've sung this tune quite a few times, so if my heart doesn't seem to be in it, try to be tolerant...Firstly, it is possible that one day the rights will be sold. Since there's an ever-looming possibility that I won't die rich, I toy very seriously with the idea of leaving the unsold rights to my wife and daughter as a kind of insurance policy. It pleasures me no end, though, I might quickly add, to know that I won't have to see the results of the transaction. I keep saying this and nobody seems to agree, but The Catcher in the Rye is a very novelistic novel. There are readymade "scenes" - only a fool would deny that - but, for me, the weight of the book is in the narrator's voice, the non-stop peculiarities of it, his personal, extremely discriminating attitude to his reader-listener, his asides about gasoline rainbows in street puddles, his philosophy or way of looking at cowhide suitcases and empty toothpaste cartons - in a word, his thoughts. He can't legitimately be separated from his own first-person technique. True, if the separation is forcibly made, there is enough material left over for something called an Exciting (or maybe just Interesting) Evening in the Theater. But I find that idea if not odious, at least odious enough to keep me from selling the rights. There are many of his thoughts, of course, that could be labored into dialogue - or into some sort of stream-of-consciousness loud-speaker device - but labored is exactly the right word. What he thinks and does so naturally in his solitude in the novel, on the stage could at best only be pseudo-simulated, if there is such a word (and I hope not). Not to mention, God help us all, the immeasurably risky business of using actors. Have you ever seen a child actress sitting crosslegged on a bed and looking right? I'm sure not. And Holden Caulfield himself, in my undoubtedly super-biassed opinion is essentially unactable. A Sensitive, Intelligent, Talented Young Actor in a Reversible Coat wouldn't be nearly enough. It would take someone with X to bring it off, and no very young man even if he has X quite knows what to do with it. And, I might add, I don't think any director can tell him.

I'll stop there. I'm afraid I can only tell you, to end with, that I feel very firm about all this, if you haven't already guessed.

Thank you, though, for your friendly and highly readable letter. My mail from producers has mostly been hell.

Sincerely,

J. D. Salinger

sitting at the table next to us at dinner tonight: curb your enthusiasm's marty funkhouser.

catfish sounds like just one of the many intricate movies, that i want to watch right now, at sundance this year.

sundance 2011 - i'm there.

"Nev, a 24-year-old New York-based photographer, has no idea what he's in for when Abby, an eight-year-old girl from rural Michigan, contacts him on MySpace, seeking permission to paint one of his photographs. When he receives her remarkable painting, Nev begins a friendship and correspondence with Abby's family. But things really get interesting when he develops a cyber-romance with Abby's attractive older sister, Megan, a musician and model. Prompted by some startling revelations about Megan, Nev and his buddies embark on a road trip in search of the truth.

Catfish centers on a riveting mystery that is completely a product of our times, where social networking, mobile devices, an electronic communication so often replace face-to-face personal contact. Henry Joost and Ariel Schulman's grounded documentary is a remarkable and powerful story of grace within a labyrinth of online intrigue."

-sundance.com

"British street artist Banksy has been creating attention-getting stenciled graffiti for years. Over the past decade, as his artistic profile has risen, Banksy's identity has remained almost totally secret. And yet, here he is with a film in the Sundance Film Festival. Exit Through the Gift Shop is...well, we're not yet sure exactly what it is. Billed as a 'pseudo-documentary' and described by Banksy as 'The story of how one man set out to film the un-filmable. And failed,' the film might show Banksy at work and reveal something about the artist. Then again, it might not.

Rhys Ifans narrates the film, which was directed (according to a statement from the filmmakers) by Terry Guetta, who 'set out to record this secretive world in thrilling detail. For more than eight years he traveled with a backpack through Europe and America. After he met a British street artist known only as Banksy, things took a bizarre turn.'"

-slashfilm.com

exit through the gift shop.

tracy morgan and terry richardson.

movies that should be boycotted immediately:

1. dear john

2. valentine's day

liz lemon: cross promotional. deal mechanics. revenue streams. jargon. synergy.

jack donaghy: that's the best presentation i've ever seen.

-30 rock

the beatles in 1957. george harrison is 14, john lennon is 16 and paul mccartney is 15.

"if you buy a woman chocolate, i can assure that you will get a blow job."

-millionaire matchmaker, patti stanger

in my apartment right now: 4 computers, 3 televisions, 3 video game consoles, 2 ipods, 2 cell phones, 1 alarm clock, me.

"Internet addiction appears to be a common disorder that merits inclusion in DSM-V. Conceptually, the diagnosis is a compulsive-impulsive spectrum disorder that involves online and/or offline computer usage and consists of at least three subtypes: excessive gaming, sexual preoccupations, and e-mail/text messaging. All of the variants share the following four components: 1) excessive use, often associated with a loss of sense of time or a neglect of basic drives, 2) withdrawal, including feelings of anger, tension, and/or depression when the computer is inaccessible, 3) tolerance, including the need for better computer equipment, more software, or more hours of use, and 4) negative repercussions, including arguments, lying, poor achievement, social isolation, and fatigue."

-Jerald J. Block, M.D., Issues for DSM-V: Internet Addiction

jean-michel basquiat. by patrick moberg.

wet hot american summer.

best scene of the movie.

susie: you guys, i'm really gonna miss this place.

coop: me too.

ben: hey, let's all promise that in ten years from today, we'll meet again and we'll see what kind of people we've blossomed into.

lindsay: ya!

ben: what time you wanna meet?

j.j.: you mean ten years from now?

ben: ya.

coop: let's meet in the morning so we can make a day of it.

susie: okay, so what is it? is it like 9 or 9:30?

coop: well let's say 9. that way we can be here by 9:30.

mckinley: well no, why don't we say 9:30 and then make it your beeswax to be here at 9:30. i mean, we're all gonna be in our late 20's by then. i just don't see any reason why we can't be places on time.

gary: okay then. it's settled. 9:30 it is. all agreed?

all: agreed

mckinley: great, 'cause i have something at 11.

gary: you just got like a trapper keeper full of appointments, right?

mckinley: no, i just - i have something at 11 that i can't change again because i already moved it twice.

"but my biggest problem with quidditch is, if the snitch is 150 points, why does anyone bother with the quaffle?"

-toofer

"check out my new book if you want to know why your wife and her friends giggle when you walk into a room and stop talking."

-homeless man in front of duane reade

click for larger image.

it should be noted that in the past decade, there have been 23 million marriages in america. 12 million of which have ended in divorce.

and we don't federally recognize same sex marriages because they corrupt the sanctity of marriage?

patrick moberg's wonderful drawings (some of which i posted here) can be found at:

his website

his twitter (he has recently begun posting a drawing a day, which is where i found the tobias funke, jim henson and woody allen drawings)

churro?

this may be old, but it is still perfectly absurdist.

i first read this poem in middle school and have been searching online for it ever since (being unable to remember the title or author, even google can only go so far). finally found it today.

At the Florist

A Man enters a flower shop

And chooses some flowers

The Florist wraps the flowers

The Man puts his hand in his pocket

Searching for money

Money to pay for the Flowers

But at the same time

Suddenly

He puts his hand on his Heart and 

Falls

At the same time as He falls

The money falls to the floor

And then the flowers fall

At the same time as the man

At the same time as the money

And the Florist stands still

With the falling money

With the damaged flowers

With the Dying Man

Obviously all this is very sad

And she must do something

The Florist

But She doesn't know what to do

Doesn't know where to start

There are so many things to do

With this Man who's Dying

These damaged Flowers

And this Money

This Money rolling

Which doesn't stop rolling.

-david holbrook

courtesy of chef boyencore.

top: google's nexus one

bottom: apple's iphone

why can't anyone make a phone as sexy as the iphone? goddamn you, at&t.

the perfect woman.

one of the most wonderfully offensive things i've seen.

from top: tobias fünke. jim henson. woody allen.

all by patrick moberg.

28 days.

disco biscuits, "portal to an empty head"

the above is a screenshot taken from my youtube account this morning. notice the only advertisement on the page, shown larger below.

big brother is watching, and his name is google.

i'm this close to adopting a dog.

"lost is the most appropriately named show on tv."

-pete goodman

"i want there to be enough cocktail weenies to make me uncomfortable about my sexuality."

-pete goodman